America on Sale by Alix Olson

[gerbilsupmyarse.livejournal.com]

snatched from community post in adbusting posted by gynocide

ATTENTION SHOPPERS!!!
attention 9 to 5 folk, cell-phone masses,
the up and coming classes,
attention sports-utility,
plastic-surgery suburbanites,
viagra-popping, gucci-shopping urbanites
attention george-clooney loonies,
promise-keeper sheep,
stockbroker sleep-walkers,
big investment talkers,
ricki lake-watchers,
attention walmart congregation,
shop til you drop generation,
ATTENTION NATION!
AMERICA?S ON SALE!



We?ve unstocked the welfare pantry
to restock the wall street gentry
it?s economically elementary
because values don?t pay
yes, american dreams are on permanent layaway!
(there was limited availability anyway)
the statue of liberty is being dismantled,
$10 a piece to sit on your mantle or hang on your wall
by the small somalian child
you bought from sally struthers
sisters and brothers, it?s now or never,
these deals won?t last forever-
AMERICA?S ON SALE!
(restrictions may apply if you?re black, gay or female)

And shoppers!
global perspective is ninety-ninety percent off
cause most of the world don?t count to us.
our ethic inventory is low
because moral business has been slow,
the values-company is moving to mexico--
and ALL ETHICS MUST GO!

It?s a remote control america that?s on sale
because standing up for justice can?t compare
to clicking through it from a lazy chair--
Answer: jerry, montel, oprah
Question: folks who really care!
for $1,000,000,000!
in this new mcveggie burger world order
where the mainstream scene has an alternative theme.
sugar daddy and ginger spice
and all cultures spliced and diced,
that?s what music is made of when
AMERICA?S ON SALE!

National health care is one-hundred percent off!
and medicare is in the 50% bin,
so you can buy--
half an operation
when AMERICA?S ON SALE!
there?s a close-out bid to detxermine which religion will win
all the neon flashing signs of sin.
the christian coalition is bidding high
shoppers, you ask WHY?!
who needs a higher power when you?ve got the purchasing power
to corner and market
one human mold.
That?s right- Real family values are being UNDERSOLD!!
And it?s open hunting season for the NRA!
there?s a special oozie discount-- only today!
Gun control?! We say--
Fuck it! Blow it all away!
welfare mothers are on the auction block again,
we?re closing out this country the way we began!
so step up for our fastest selling commodity
no waiting lines for HIV,
condoms and needle-exchange are a hard to sell thing
(to the right wing)
while America?s on sale!

We?re selling fast to the AT&T CEO,
he?s stealing all utilities, he doesn?t pass go,
and collects all the money anyway!
he?s the monopoly winner cause he bought the whole board
and we bought the whole game
now no price is the same!

Because inflation is up on the CEO ego
and power is deflated as far as we go:

Nike bought the revolution,
and law schools bought the constitution!
Tommy Hilfiger bought the red, white, and blue,
(a flag shirt for fifty dollars,
the one being burned is you!)
Marlboro bought what it means to be a man,
Lexus equals power- so get it while you can.
Maybelline bought beauty,
New York?s buying Rudy Guiliani,
Mastercard Gold bought the national soul
Broadway bought talent and called it CATS!
the Republicans bought out the Democrats-
they liquidated all asses in a fat white donkey sale-
now it?s buy one shmuck, get one shmuck free
in the capitalist party!

And there?s nothing left to get in the way
of a full blue-light blow-out
of the U.S. of A!
there?s a:
no-nothing back guarantee,
a zero-year warranty,
when you buy this land of the fritos, ruffles, lays..
this home of the braves, the chiefs, the reds, the slaves!
so call 1-800- i don?t care about shit
or www.FUCK ALL OF IT!
to receive your credit for the fate of our nation-
(call now! interest is at an all-time low)

But hurry shoppers!
because america?s being downsized, citizens,
and you?re all fired.

(no subject)

[silverflurry.livejournal.com]

A Satirical Elegy

On the Death of a Late FAMOUS GENERAL

His Grace! impossible! what dead!
Of old age, too, and in his bed!
And could that Mighty Warrior fall?
And so inglorious, after all!
Well, since he's gone, no matter how,
The last loud trump must wake him now:
And, trust me, as the noise grows stronger,
He'd wish to sleep a little longer.
And could he be indeed so old
As by the news-papers we're told?
Threescore, I think, is pretty high;
'Twas time in conscience he should die.
This world he cumber'd long enough;
He burnt his candle to the snuff;
And that's the reason, some folks think,
He left behind so great a stink.
Behold his funeral appears,
Nor widow's sighs, nor orphan's tears,
Wont at such times each heart to pierce,
Attend the progress of his hearse.
But what of that, his friends may say,
He had those honours in his day.
True to his profit and his pride,
He made them weep before he dy'd.
Come hither, all ye empty things,
Ye bubbles rais'd by breath of Kings;
Who float upon the tide of state,
Come hither, and behold your fate.
Let pride be taught by this rebuke,
How very mean a thing's a Duke;
From all his ill-got honours flung,
Turn'd to that dirt from whence he sprung.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Swift, Jonathan. 1726. The Works.

(no subject)

[penguinboy.livejournal.com]

The Dead

Their reward is
they become innocent again,

and when they reappear in memory
death has completely erased
the blurs, given them boundaries. They rise

and move through their new world with clean,
clear edges. My grandmother, in particular
has become buoyant, unattached finally

from her histories, from the trappings
of family. By no means was she

a good woman. But the dead don't care anymore for that.
Weightless, they no longer assume
responsibility, they no longer

have bodies. Once,

at the end of August, after swimming
in the muddy pond

I'd gone into the living room, cool
as vodka, where my grandmother
sat. Greed thins a woman,

I remember her rings, bigger
than her fingers.
Water ran down my legs

onto the floor becoming slippery
and my grandmother, her breath
scratchy from cigarettes and blended whiskey,

leaned into my ear and whispered
you're an ugly girl. Do I have

to forgive her? My mother tells me

no one ever loved her,
so when I see her, I see her again in the park
in her pink tailored suit, suede pumps,

I see her moving among the strange
gentlemen that have gathered, the dark
powerful men. She is still young, blonde

and most of all, she is beyond reach, beautiful.

by Kate Northrop

FYI: For those of y'all who like my posts, I'll be out of town till Tuesday...