Susan Minot

[moonglows.livejournal.com]

There's a man I've thought of many hours . . .

By Susan Minot
(from Poems 4 A. M.)


and
3
a.m.
tonight
he
sleeps
somewhere
and
though
I
no
longer
hope
to
keep
him
near
or
to
kiss
his
grave
face
or
drink
his
sigh

I
don't
mind
thinking
of
his
closed
eyes
or
of
his
mouth
parted
and
how
my
own
once
rested
there
full-hearted

Comments

[rainsquall.livejournal.com]

The line breaks are shitting me off, but this was a lovely poem otherwise.

[treelife.livejournal.com]

A sad poem.

[zagzagael.livejournal.com]

It's a shame about the line breaks...

[treelife.livejournal.com]

I thought they were good because every word either moved me emotionally or formed a picture in my mind. When I reached the last word, the sadness hit me sudden like.

[moonglows.livejournal.com]

That was my response too. Poetry is an art form that pushes us to pay attention to each word, but I thought that this poem takes that intention one step farther. Some may find the line breaks off-putting (obviously) but I think that they push the reader in directions that are interesting--for lack of a better word.

[zagzagael.livejournal.com]

I do agree that in this instance, the breaks create a HUGE emotional whap with the last word. However, I think it could have been done more elegantly...and still left the reader with that impact. Or more compactly.

[whollyafool.livejournal.com]

this is so lovely and sad.

i didn't really mind the line breaks...sort of like what treeline said, i think that it gives each word extra meaning and impact in what would be a pretty simple, straightforward poem otherwise.