Billy Collins, 'Another Reason Why I Don't Keep A Gun In The House'

[duathir.livejournal.com]

Another Reason Why I Don't Keep A Gun In The House

The neighbors' dog will not stop barking.
He is barking the same high, rhythmic bark
that he barks every time they leave the house.
They must switch him on on their way out.

The neighbors' dog will not stop barking.
I close all the windows in the house
and put on a Beethoven symphony full blast
but I can still hear him muffled under the music,
barking, barking, barking,

and now I can see him sitting in the orchestra,
his head raised confidently as if Beethoven
had included a part for barking dog.

When the record finally ends he is still barking,
sitting there in the oboe section barking,
his eyes fixed on the conductor who is
entreating him with his baton

while the other musicians listen in respectful
silence to the famous barking dog solo,
that endless coda that first established
Beethoven as an innovative genius.

By Billy Collins

Comments

[chamekke.livejournal.com]

Oh, this is lovely! A credenza for canines. I wish Beethoven had thought of it.

(By the way, if you've never heard Peter Schickele's New Horizons in Music Appreciation" (Beethoven's Fifth) (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f0vHpeUO5mw), you probably should - it even begins with a dog barking faintly in the background :-)

[duathir.livejournal.com]

I am glad you like it. I once knew a dog who barked like that whenever his people left.

Thank you for the link; it was quite a symphony.

[bleodswean.livejournal.com]

I super enjoyed reading this with my morning cup of coffee. Thank you!

[duathir.livejournal.com]

You are most welcome; I am glad you enjoyed it.

[oonaseckar.livejournal.com]

his head raised confidently as if Beethoven
had included a part for barking dog.
lol maybe he should've. Maybe Vivaldi?

This is very peaceful and meditative, considering the murderous rage lurking underneath.

[duathir.livejournal.com]

Maybe Mozart. The Marriage of Figaro could use a barking dog.

The murderous rage seems to have been soothed by music and humor. Collins does not say which symphony he chose, but the 4th movement of the Ninth is a cure for many ills when played loudly enough.